Friday, October 31, 2008

Reason is not your forte, my sweet.

Dear Ms. Thomas;

It has come to our attention that, within a published letter critical of Barack HUSSIEN Obama, you postulated that the senator is a funny-named Arab that wants to kill white babies. While we appreciate your campaigning on our behalf, we find that your methods are outdated and not in line with group policy.

We mostly have an issue with your lack of subtlety. You openly state that Obama wants to destroy the white race. We here at The Legion of Idiotic Paranoid Racist Dillweeds find this to be too "on-the-nose", as it were. This repels potential allies from our cause.

We realize that you, like most of our members, have the intelligence of an overripe and very angry little eggplant. Therefore, we have taken the liberty of providing you with some talking points that convey the message without being so bare-assed about it.

*Instead of pointing that his name is Arab, simply insist on including his middle name whenever you address him. If that's too subtle for your intended audience, try emphaisizing his middle name with all caps. Note the example above.

*Try your best to disguise the real reason why you are opposed to family planning. We realize that our main concern is preserving the privileges of the Master Race (along with those of the Master Sex of that race) but racist social Darwinism is frowned upon and reflects poorly on us. Tell yourself and others that you care about BABIES, and nothing but BABIES.

We hope you keep these tips in mind when the time comes to write a letter bemoaning America's new president. Remember, we here at Legion of Idiotic Paranoid Racist Dillweeds appreciate you!

Sincerely,
The Legion of Idiotic Paranoid Racist Dillweeds

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