Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Love Me, I'm a Liberal Democrat!

Let's use our time travel powers to post Thursday letters!

You may have noticed that, more often than not, this blog focuses on conservative letters more than liberal letters. Four reasons:

1. The Globe gets more conservative letters, period. Therefore, the percentage of wingnuts is always going to be higher than moonbats.

2. Any leftwing letters the Globe gets are usually too tame, sane, well-written and all-around unremarkable for this blog. Alien abductees, Scientologists and 9/11 conspirators are few and far between.

3. Most stupid people are conservative. John Stuart Mill knew it, Colbert knows it, dogs know it. It's a fact of life.

4. It's my blog, I can post whatever I want, so nyeh.

Today, however, conservatives get a break. Let's have a look.

Let's start with this guy. He's a liberal- he says so in the first sentence! He also thinks we should declare war on the entire Middle East to get their oil.



Meanwhile, we have someone weighing in on the homeless controversy.* It's a typical "mean people suck" letter. These letters tend to be well-intended; but also preachy, cliched and overwrought.


Here's a fun drinking game: reread this letter and take one drink whenever the word "bigot" or any of its variants show up. Reread over and over until drunk. This is why we have thesauruses, people.

*For those not up to date, the City of Refuge is a religious organization that wants to build a homeless shelter in Joplin. Some people were all like, "Eww! Homeless people! Lowered property values!", and the other side was all like "Eww! Snotty heartless bigots!", and there was a small minority going "Eww! Evangelical vultures bribing people with basic necessities!" Most of these letters ended right before the blog started.

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